I might be mental.
You may remember how Perris and I tend to have a lot of funny experiences as we are sleeping. Well, sometimes I wake up from a scary dream (like bad men chasing me, etc. I have night anxiety I guess. Or just all around anxiety.), and can't fall asleep again. I will tap on Perris' shoulder and say "I had a bad dream and I can't fall asleep." He will say he's sorry and scoot a bit closer so he's touching me, and say "is that better?" (As soon as I say "yes" he's dead to the world again in .002 seconds.) And it usually is better. I need to feel protected, ya know! BUT I sleep closest to the door...so I am closest to invaders/burglars/crazy people/sounds of Wade in need, or needing CPR/knocks on the door because there is a fire/etc.
Friday morning I wake up on Perris' side of the bed and remember how we had switched. But that afternoon, I thought "Wait. Did we really start the night sleeping on opposite sides? How did that happen?" I remembered I had in fact asked him to switch sides with me, but the more I thought about it the more I realized I was not fully awake when I did! So I asked Perris. He said I indeed asked him very early in the morning if he would switch sides with me. He said he asked me why but doesn't remember my response. I remember him crawling over me and me under him to the "safe" side. So we have officially switched sides on the bed. I am on the left and he the right. That's like my parents. It's kind of monumental. But I have slept super sound (and safe!) on the far side near the wall. Isn't that funny my mentality can do something like make me not sleep as well at night for fear of...something [everything]!
What side do you sleep on? Am I crazy?
Wade isn't crazy. He's just crazy cute. Yum, broccoli!
As I went to post this one I found an old post I wrote but never finish or posted. From May 14th. I giggled reading through it. OH what a hard time that really was for me! And I did burst into tears a lot! Little did I know I had another WEEK before our little Wade came. I'm glad I have this, though. Perspectives....
May 14, 2011
Boy has this been a week. A strange week. A good week...and so many other types of words could fill in what this week was like. A turning point...a week of adjustment and keeping busy. An obsessed thoughts of childbirth week. Oh childbirth; That still seems so far away. So so far away... so far away that I may have cried yesterday morning after Perris left bed. Mostly a feeling of defeat. thoughts of "ok. I am in no control. ever." "this is really uncomfortable." "i'm trying not to be discouraged." "can't it just happen really soon?" etc.
currently i lay on the couch. basically whenever perris speaks to me I begin to spring tears... I just burst into tears earlier when i said I didn't want to go to a picnic. I don't want to go anywhere or do anything or answer anyones questions about how i feel, or about being pregnant in general. just leave me alone, please. And thank you. I know everyone is just concerned and being kind but at this point i want to be a cave woman until I can shout hallelujahs of my son being born...So instead, I logged onto Tara's netflix and watched a movie. Then I tried to sleep. Then I listened to the thunder roll outside...that was nice. we have the door open and it's cool and spring fresh grass smelling. And I'm starving. We shall be calling senor Papa John for some pizza goodness
Friday morning I wake up on Perris' side of the bed and remember how we had switched. But that afternoon, I thought "Wait. Did we really start the night sleeping on opposite sides? How did that happen?" I remembered I had in fact asked him to switch sides with me, but the more I thought about it the more I realized I was not fully awake when I did! So I asked Perris. He said I indeed asked him very early in the morning if he would switch sides with me. He said he asked me why but doesn't remember my response. I remember him crawling over me and me under him to the "safe" side. So we have officially switched sides on the bed. I am on the left and he the right. That's like my parents. It's kind of monumental. But I have slept super sound (and safe!) on the far side near the wall. Isn't that funny my mentality can do something like make me not sleep as well at night for fear of...something [everything]!
What side do you sleep on? Am I crazy?
Wade isn't crazy. He's just crazy cute. Yum, broccoli!
May 14, 2011
Boy has this been a week. A strange week. A good week...and so many other types of words could fill in what this week was like. A turning point...a week of adjustment and keeping busy. An obsessed thoughts of childbirth week. Oh childbirth; That still seems so far away. So so far away... so far away that I may have cried yesterday morning after Perris left bed. Mostly a feeling of defeat. thoughts of "ok. I am in no control. ever." "this is really uncomfortable." "i'm trying not to be discouraged." "can't it just happen really soon?" etc.
currently i lay on the couch. basically whenever perris speaks to me I begin to spring tears... I just burst into tears earlier when i said I didn't want to go to a picnic. I don't want to go anywhere or do anything or answer anyones questions about how i feel, or about being pregnant in general. just leave me alone, please. And thank you. I know everyone is just concerned and being kind but at this point i want to be a cave woman until I can shout hallelujahs of my son being born...So instead, I logged onto Tara's netflix and watched a movie. Then I tried to sleep. Then I listened to the thunder roll outside...that was nice. we have the door open and it's cool and spring fresh grass smelling. And I'm starving. We shall be calling senor Papa John for some pizza goodness
I totally feel safer sleeping on the non-door side of the bed. But I also want to sleep on the right side of the bed (as we're laying). It has worked out for us wherever we've lived since we got married that I could keep my side and still be "safe." Plus, now Clint has his gun safe on his side of the bed - the door side. :)
ReplyDeleteI am a door side sleeper. It's all about the babies and being able to get to them in the shortest distance possible. I have to be in control as well...it probably says something about my personality. But we do not have the crazy stories you guys do about your night time crazies. They sure make for a good laugh :)
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