thinking...
As I watched Perris play his first basketball intramural game of the season, I looked around me. “these people look really… little…” I observed the girls cheering on the other members of P’s team. I watched people walk in and out of the gym to catch a glance of the game. Walking away afterward I thought about the building we were in and how it was my building during my college years, and I said, “You know, if you had told me when I started at BYU in 2003 that I would still be walking through these buildings in 2011, I don’t know what I would have thought.” Well if that was because I was still in school I would have thought HOLY CRAP that is a long time to finish college! But moments like this, or when we go to a BYU basketball game, or when I go to church with all single college students, I think “I am still here?”
It’s not a bad thing. It’s just been a long time and it causes me to stop and think.
You know what else causes me to stop and think? When I saw my belly in the changing room at Gap yesterday. Justo yesterday (justo is a Spanish word that there is just not quite an equivalent to in English. It’s just the only thing that fits. It means like “by coincidence” or “in fact, if you can believe it” this is really hard to explain.) I was wondering aloud to Perris when my belly was really going to get BIG, like “there is DEFINITELY a baby in that woman’s stomach” Big.
Enter yesterday trying on a stretchy jersey skirt (to fit the belly—no skirts fit!) as a birthday present from Mo-in-law Susan. I put it on and p enters dressing room. I lift my shirt to show him the top and look in the mirror from the side. All of a sudden I see the belly that is protruding from myself and say “WHAT the heck was I talking about, my belly is BIG!” He agreed. (And pointed it out to our class as we taught Sunday School today. Thank you for directing everyone to stare at my body.)
I just keep having those thoughts of “this isn’t my body”. But then again I like it. I want it to grow . This is all a very new experience!! And it’s really cool and humbling and special. I feel like our little wooter squat doesn’t move around enough. Am I paranoid? Or is this a legit concern? I am 24 weeks, not far away from entering trimester THREE.
Bring it on.
i wouldn't worry about him not moving much. eventually he'll be moving so much and sticking out all over the place. take a video of it, it's awesome to look at later!
ReplyDeleteand it'll be weird after he comes and you start wearing regular clothes and then look back at photos of when you were pregnant and think, "i was THAT big?" haha!
i want to see a pic of your cute belly!
Ali,
ReplyDeleteI had the SAME concern the WHOLE time I was pregnant! I was constantly worrying about something happening to the baby, and me not realizing it. But, soon you'll start to learn your baby's patterns, and it'll help put your mind at ease. And, even if you still worry...it's normal! Just trust your "gut" and all will be well! We're excited to meet your little boy!